Today we have erotic romance author Anne Douglas here to talk about BDSM, but from a less traditional angle. We’re very pleased to have her on the blog and hope you’ll help us make her feel welcome.
_____________________________
When many think of a sexually submissive man they aren’t thinking of a roughly 6ft tall, tanned, with tousled dark-hair hunk.
But I was.
They also might be thinking leather, whips and 6inch stiletto heel dominatrix boots, or maybe a BDSM club with willing male slaves looking for a Dominatrix.
But I wasn’t.
The guy I was looking for was your fairly average guy (okay, just a touch above average), with a great job, great friends… and an awesome girlfriend who wasn’t afraid to fuck him in the arse with a strap on dildo (pegging, (linky: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pegging_(sexual_practice)) for those of you not in the know).
Just a little different than that scene with those delicious black Dominatrix boots, right?
Often female domination comes with an expectation of weak, ineffectual, impotent men. Hmmm…yet women find strength and power through submission. How does that figure then? What’s good enough for the goose isn’t so for the gander? (But that, oooh, that’s a whole other post J). But what happens when the male sub isn’t weak or impotent or needing to be ‘shown’ submission suits him? What if he’s strong (although conflicted) and rather more than capable of getting the job done in bed, but most of all, really enjoys submitting to his partner? Where does he fit into the picture?
Not entirely all that well. It wasn’t easy to find what I was looking for – thank goodness for the Internet being filled with kink! I did eventually find a small handful (more like a couple of fingers) of websites/people/groups who are putting a positive spin on being a male submissive – those looking on it as a desirable thing, not an emasculating one.
Female Domination is often tied up with heavy bondage/discipline and I didn’t want that for His Intimate Submission (the original title of Subtle Domination will probably give you an idea of
where I was going). I wanted to write about a man only just coming to the realization that he wants to be topped in bed; a woman who finds she’s quite happy to do so; and the way those things changed and evolved their relationship. In other words, curious but inexperienced people pretty much like you and me (well, most of the you’s out there, some of the other you’s are a pretty kinky lot!).
I’d love to hear others ideas, views or comments on female domination/male submission – I’m hoping there are a few other ladies out there like me who don’t particularly associate with a deep desire to relinquish control (my life is quite out of control enough as it is, thanks).
_______________
Anne is a woman of many talents. Besides writing erotic romance she also handcrafts covers for the Sony eReader (you can find them here at Etsy).
Leave a comment telling us your thoughts on female domination/male submission and you’ll be entered to win your choice of an e-copy of His Intimate Submission or, if you own a Sony eReader, one a cover from Anne’s Addictions.
Contest will end Friday, December 18 at 11:59 p.m. by the time stamp on the blog.

