A truly awful, terrible thing happened to me a few weeks ago. I discovered a whole slew of monster-porn books. Yes, people, that’s a real thing. I could have gone my whole life without knowing that. Unfortunately (or fortunately, depending on your outlook), I firmly believe misery loves company. Therefore I’m going to share with you some of the…best?..worst?…covers I discovered.
This week’s cover is probably my favorite of the bunch. Just because it’s so….freaking hilarious.
You guys, I’m not even kidding. This is an actual book.
First, the title. I mean, come on. That’s pretty freaking awesome. It begs the question, though…Does Life Alert support this kind of thing? Do they have a special tracking center just for anal penetration? Because that could be kind of traumatizing, if you know what I mean. I would not want that job. I kind of wonder if this isn’t just some lame excuse she came up with when she was busted stepping out on her man. “Oh no, honey, I wasn’t screwing around on you. I fell and the tentacle went up my butt!” Seems legit.
The title is pretty great, but let’s not forget the cover. Her face, for example. I can’t decide if she’s sort of pissed a tentacle went up her butt when she fell, or if she’s just bored with the whole thing. Of course, I kind of doubt she’s getting the stimulation she should, since that tentacle is a cartoon. I saw Who Framed Roger Rabbit. I know how that whole toon/human thing works. Also, I’m pretty sure she’s wearing an animal print bikini and Uggs. Which makes me want to say Ugh (heh heh heh ).
Just between us? I’m sort of tempted to read it. Don’t judge me.
Terrible. *shakes head*
That’s all sorts of WTF-ery. That doesn’t even look like a book cover, it’s like someone was pissed at the chick, ripped the photo off her FB page and then photoshopped that lol
Edward Naughty….heh