One of the first Valentine’s Days that my hubby and I spent together he bought me this sleep shirt that had huge red hearts on it and the front was filled with endearments – sweetheart, pumpkin, sweetie, baby, honey, dumpling, etc. We had a fun time making up our own pet names combining some of the names on the shirt. Eventually our favorite combo was Precious Pumpkin Butt (no I don’t think butt was on the shirt but we couldn’t resist adding it!). That was 18 or 19 years ago and to this day we still sometimes sign cards to each other “Your P.P.B.”. We don’t actually call each other the name – ever. Do we have pet names for each other other than the joke one? Kind of. Sometimes I call him baby – sometimes hey you, (lol) but mostly I just call him by his name.
So what brought this up? Lately I’ve read some books where pet names have been included and frankly the ones they use have annoyed me.
“Petal” was one that was used recently and I couldn’t help roll my eyes every time I read it – which was frequent. Maybe it bugged me because he’d met the woman 10 minutes prior to giving her the name and he had no clue what her name was or anything about her? IDK, but once he learned her name the pet name continued.
Yesterday I read a book where the man was calling the girl “little heart”. I’m sorry – why would you want to call the woman you love something that brings to mind The Grinch? I don’t think I’d like to be known as little heart – I’ve got a big one dammit! lol
When I was at Holly’s recently Lori reminded us of a book where the heroine was called “little flower” constantly. Why? Why do you insist on calling her that? Do you hate the woman’s name? Did you forget what her real name was? lol
Pet names don’t always irritate me. I guess it all comes down to the appeal of the pet name in the story, how often it’s used and the why behind the name in the first place. I absolutely need an explanation of why you’re calling your man or woman that name.
So do pet names annoy you or not? What are some of the ones that have and why?
The most common pet name around the Bat Cave is "honey." Sometimes "baby" is used. My Man also likes to make up totally absurd pet names to call me when he's in a goofy mood.
But in books? I hate pet names. Loathe them. I'm sitting here, fully caffeinated, trying to think of one instance where a pet name didn't annoy the sh*t out of me in a romance novel and….I got nothing. The worst pet name I've ever read? In a historical erotic romance. The hero kept calling the heroine his "filly." Seriously, you're calling her a HORSE!!! What heroine with two brain-cells to rub together would find that remotely flattering?
I don't mind pet names in books, but the generic ones get to me. Especially in m/m books. Baby, honey, sugar, babe. *sigh*
When we were dating, my hubby called me his peach. That wore off.
When I call him baby, he makes crying noises. That stops me pretty quick.
I guess my standard for him is Handsome.
Now I have another male friend that I have been calling stud, because he spends all his spare time at the gym, and he is requesting a different nick name…. haven't come up with one yet.
Hmmm. I like baby, I think it comes naturally to a lot of people and both sexes so seems normal. They don't really bug me. I'm not big on honey because I think my uncle called my aunt that so it kind of gives me the heebie jeebies to think about them in a sexual situation. LOL
I don't have anyone to call me bet names. Sigh. I call the kid Punchkin Munchkin (no clue why) or Krystynka which was what the Poles called her when we lived in Warsaw because they couldn't wrap their heads about her not being called Krystina and that's the cutsey version of her name. I call her Minoushka too. No clue why. LOL Pet names are often totally made-up which is half the fun.
There are a select few pet names that don't irritate me, like "baby", "honey" and "beautiful". I also don't mind ones that are a play on someone's name (as long as they aren't too stupid). But the minute a pet name gets cutesy or sappy my teeth get set on edge. I can be so distracting.
Wendy – OMG you make me laugh. I can't imagine a man calling a woman filly unless he was thinking of purchasing her like a horse! lol
SWV – I think the generic ones, to me at least, are more appealing. I think because they roll off the tongue so naturally. 🙂
Tell your friend that stud is much better than rat as in gym rat. lol
Tam- lol I wouldn't use honey either in that instance!
I was definitely speaking of man/woman pet names in this post – and those are the ones that annoy me. I most definitely use pet names for my kids. My oldest is "my little choochie face" (chitty chitty bang bang) which she hates – which means I do it all the time because I'm evil that way. lol The little one…and don't ask me why…is baby head. She's been baby head since she was born and it's never changed. *shrugs* I'm a dork. lol
DL – I agree – they can be very distracting. If they're too weird it throws me out of the story and that's just wrong! 🙂
Hubby called me "ole dear" for a while and that went over like a cement canary. I like Baby, but I notice that "sweetheart" is often used when the person is not really a sweetheart in the story. Seems to me that is just a little condescending. Lots of Alpha types seem to find a way to say whatever pet name they use in a condescending manner. I tolerate it because it seems a part of the romance genre. Do I like it? Not much . . .
We have pet names for each other, but they're only dragged out very rarely, and I am so not sharing what they are. Suffice to say that they put Little Flower to shame, LOL. But mostly, Bob calls me Babe and I call him sweetie. All together now… Awwwwww.
As for in books, I agree Tracy. They need to be the everyday ones, because those seem the most natural. The one that gets me is "Cowboy". I hate it with the strength of a thousand… ok, I forgot the rest of that one, but you get the picture. I notice, especially in m/m books, once they become lovers, it's like they forget the other person ever had a name. It's Cowboy, lover, whatever. Frankly, I can't remember a time when there was that much name calling in my own lovemaking, but maybe I'm just strange.
No one has ever called me a pet name, except for my mother, but that's obviously for different reasons.
And…I don't know. Pet names just don't work for me… *shrug* maybe it's because it doesn't seem all that read to me. Not very helpful, am I? *grin*
For me, nicknames yes, but not pet names… then again, I'm single LOL… but even in books, the generic ones annoy me a little… Just because I'm not used to it, but also the frequency ^_^;
It also depends on the characters and the situations… A hero that has a pet name for the heroine such as "little flower, filly, etc.," it just sounds condescending/patronizing to me.
However, I have to defend "little heart" here… because I've never seen the Grinch, so I would not have made the connection… which is perhaps the same with the author 😛
Not a fame of pet names in books, because, as others have noted, they get annoying fast. I think the only people I have pet names for are my nieces, one online friend, and, well, my pets (Thug Boy and MayMay or Bug Girl).
FAN. Not fame. Sheesh.
LOL, I found some old letters my husband and I wrote each other while dating signed, "Your Boopie". Your Boopie WTH were we thinking?
Honestly, I can't recall pet names bothering me while I read, though. Maybe if I thought about it one would come to me.
Don't like pet names in books. The hero could have five other girlfriends on the go, and he calls them all 'baby' so he never makes the mistake of calling them by the wrong name.
Post brought to mind the scene in Spartacus where Sura tells Spartacus she'll stay with him if he asks her to stay. He says 'Stay'. But she tells him she wants him to ask her using her name. Of course, he doesn't know it (ouch! – though of course she knew he didn't know it) and she leaves.
Dr J – Yeah, I'd hit my hubby if he called me Ole Dear! lol Yeah, the whole condescending pet name can go fly a kite – definitely not for me either.
Lori – Oh come on, share! lol
Cowboy? Ug. That wouldn't work for me at all.
I don't tend to notice it so much in m/m. Is it because the pet names aren't as ridiculous?
Orannia – I'm with ya. I think it has to roll off the tongue in order to work for me and things like Petal just don't work.
Nath – Nicknames are definitely different.
Little Heart – whether you know about the Grinch is just wrong imho. lol
Barbara – Your Boopie? lolol OMG that's a good one. I'm sure you had perfectly good reasons for calling each other that. I hope. 🙂
I think it's been the onslaught of pet names in the books that I'm reading that really punched it home for me.
LesleyW – True! A co-worker told me recently he was dating in 3D – he was dating Debbie, Deanna & Denise. I told him he needed to just call them D so that he wouldn't accidentally call them the wrong name. Of course they all knew about the other because it was all casual dating so it wouldn't have mattered I guess. 🙂
And I love Spartacus! 🙂 That was a great scene.
I'm not crazy about pet names either. But if one like babe, baby, honey, or sweetheart was used only in a specific moments of importance, it would be okay for emphasis of whatever emotion was going on. But not as a replacement for a person's name.