Tag: Contemporary

Christmas Gift Alert: Something Naughty for the Bad Boy in Your Life

Posted December 7, 2007 by Holly in Reviews | 5 Comments

Christmas Gift Alert: Something Naughty for the Bad Boy in Your LifeReviewer: Holly
Office Slave by J. W. McKenna
Series: Office Slave #1
Published by CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform
Publication Date: August 19th 2005
Genres: Fiction, Romance, Contemporary
Pages: 295
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one-star

The beautiful but haughty Ellen Sanchez thought she could get away with embezzling from Jack Sawyer, the powerful CEO of Sawyer Metalworking. When she was caught, she said she'd do "anything" to avoid going to jail. Anything turned out to be a new position for Ellen: Company sex slave.

The other day, I got to thinking about the difference between erotic romance written by men and erotic romance written by women. Some of the differences I’m sure are glaring, but others might not be, and I was curious. We all know men have been writing erotica for ages (hello Letters to Penthouse) but the market has recently been flooded with erotica written by women. I kind of wonder if men ever read it, but that’s a post for another day. Anyway, I decided to read a book written by a man that was marketed as “erotic romance” to see what I thought.

So I bought Office Slave by J.W. McKenna from eBookwise. As soon as I read the first chapter (which is available online) I knew it was written by a man. Don’t believe me? Well, read it yourself to see what I mean.

Anyway, in the name of research, I took one for the team (so to speak) and bought this book. I started reading it yesterday and finished it last night. It was…interesting. Let me run it down for you:

Ellen Sanchez was the CFO (Chief Financial Officer) for this company and she was embezzling money from them because her no good husband had been out of work for over a year. The owner of the company, Jack, finds out and says he’s going to turn her in to the cops. But she doesn’t want that to happen, so she says she’ll do ANYTHING to keep him from turning her in. He says, “Anything?” and she says, “Yes, anything”.

So he makes her the office sex slave. He tells her from now on she’s to do exactly what he says, when he says it. She’s not allowed to make any decisions for herself and she bascially has to be humilliated as the company slut.

He puts her in a glass fronted office and makes her sit at her desk (the desk that faces the glass so anyone who walks by can see her) naked. He installs cameras under her desk and tells her she’s no longer allowed to wear underwear, and she has to keep her legs spread open under her desk so he can see her through the camera at all times. When he calls her on the phone, she’s supposed to start rubbing herself and not stop until they hang up. He punishes her when she doesn’t follow one of his rules. Sometimes he spanks her with his belt when she’s naughty and he made her get her nipples pierced and her clit pierced.

In order to pay back her debt, she had to screw whoever he says. So she screwed or blew all his clients and the lunch delivery guy and the limo driver and even the girls in the office. He called it the new company “incentive” program and she was the prize to whoever did the best.

They called her “Slut” or “El”, which by the end of the book were interchangeable to her. Every time she went into his office (the boss) no matter who was in there, she had to remove all her clothes, kneel on the floor in front of his desk with her legs spread as far as possible and say, “How may I serve you today, Master?” And while she was kneeling there, he’d either rub her breasts or play with her clit, but never let her cum.

In less than 12 months, she paid back her debt in full, which is quite an accomplishment, considering she got $100 for each blowjob and $250 for every screw. Do the math and on that and tell me you aren’t scared. Yes, she screwed enough people to pay off a $257,000 debt. So he said he’d release her from her duty, but by then she begged her “master” not to let her go. Basically, every man’s fantasy. A woman who doesn’t want to think about or do anything beyond spreading her legs for whomever wants her. Oh, and she was named “Employee of the Month” 12 months running. Which is when I realized this isn’t the awful, sexist, chauvinistic, ridiculous farce of a novel I thought it was, but instead it’s a joke. Ha ha ha ha ha.

So, I’m offering this up as my latest “Christmas Gift Alert” because I have a feeling most men will want a copy of this. Why not surprise the man in your life with something untraditional this year?

I’m giving it:

1.5 out of 5 for the story
and
4.5 out of 5 for the sheer entertainment value it offered.

You can buy it here or at Amazon for the Kindle here.

And BONUS, there’s a sequel. Office Slave II: El Exposed

Dude, I’m so buying that. Be kind to the main man in your life and buy him both. I doubt you’ll regret it. And if you think he won’t like it, check out the Amazon reviews…I’m telling you, the men will love it.

PS. Yes, I’m pretty sure that’s her butt.

one-star

Review: To Catch A Cheat by Kelly St. John

Posted December 5, 2007 by Holly in Reviews | 7 Comments

Review: To Catch A Cheat by Kelly St. JohnTo Catch a Cheat by Kelley St. John
Published by Grand Central Publishing
Publication Date: November 1st 2007
Genres: Fiction, Romance, General
Pages: 416
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four-stars

Single thirty-something Marissa, though beautiful and talented, is becoming increasingly skeptical about romance because every man in her life has been a cheater. She creates a website dedicated to exposing serial cheaters, but instead her website ushers back into her life her first boyfriend from adolescence, and he is determined to show her that a man can be true.

Kelly St. John created a cute, contemporary romance here that was laced with sarcasm, humor and wit. The interactions between Trent and Marissa were hilarious, and we were offered basically a three-in-one deal, as there was more going on in the background with the secondary characters.

I liked Marissa, but I think she took her insecurities a bit too far. Though I understand she was cheated on one too many times, she seemed almost a bit too jaded. Plus, she had daddy issues, and that bothers me some (i.e., punished all the men in her life for the actions of her father) in general and in this novel. Still, I enjoyed her wit and sarcasm and found myself sympathizing with her and – I’ll admit it – laughing a bit when her latests squeeze cheats on her…with another man. Ouch!

I think the thing that made this story for me, however, was Trent. I just LOVE it when a hero decides he’s in love with the heroine early on and will do whatever it takes to get her. I don’t think we see that often enough. Though he wants to prove himself as a business guru in his own right and not as the figurehead of his grandfathers company, he doesn’t have major issues. He’s just a sweet, laid back, super sexy kind of guy.

Together they had great chemistry and I think their relationship progressed at a nice pace. They didn’t immediately jump in the sack, and they really took the time to get to know each other. Not that they had much of a choice with the radio station dictating how they spent their time together, but still.

There were a couple of times when the story seemed to drag, mostly in the middle, and I wonder if it had been just a bit shorter if the story wouldn’t have been better. But overall I truly enjoyed it. The relationship Marissa has with her two best friends Candi and Amy was great and I could so see me and the girls from here acting just like they did: Talking about our sex lives, hating on our ex’s, creating polls about who’s sexier in boxers or briefs..well, pretty much what we do now.

The radio contest was a good twist – something we don’t see very often. I thought the two radio DJ’s were hilarious and the entire farce fun and entertaining.

I’m going to give it:

4.0 out of 5

I’ll be on the lookout for more by Kelly St. John. You can buy it here or here.

four-stars

Christmas Gift Alert: Last Days of Summer by Steve Kluger

Posted December 2, 2007 by Holly in Miscellaneous | 0 Comments


May 15, 1940

Charlie Banks

New York Giants

Polo Grounds, New York

Dear Mr. Banks:

I am a 12-year-old boy and I am dying from malaria. Please hit a home run for me because I don’t think I will be around much longer.

Your friend,

Joey Margolis

Dear Kid:

Last week it was the plague. Now it’s malaria. What do I look – stupid to you? You’re lucky I don’t send somebody over there to tap you on the conk. I am enclosing 1 last picture. Do not write to me again.

Chase. Banks

3d Base

Dear Charlie:

Nobody asked for your damn picture. I never even heard of you before. And you can forget about the home run too. The only reason I needed one was because the bullies who keep beating me up somehow thought you were my best friend and the homer was supposed to keep them from slugging me anymore. Thanks for nothing.

Can I go on a road trip with you?

Your arch enemy,

Joey Margolis

Dear Joey:

“Somehow” they thought I was your best friend? Where did they hear that from? A Nazi spy? J. Herbert Hoover? Franklin Delano Biscuithead? And didn’t I tell you not to write to me anymore? Go bug DiMaggio.

Charlie

P.S. And just because there’s a spot open for a bat boy this summer doesn’t mean your going to get it. Even if we ARE chips off the same block. May 15, 1940

I don’t think I’ve ever read a funnier book. Seriously. At least once a page I laughed out loud.

Last Days of Summer is the story of a young Jewish boy’s journey to manhood, with the help of a rookie baseball player in the early 1940’s, told in the form of letters the pair sent back and forth with each other and various other characters. You might think this wouldn’t work, but on the contrary, I flew through it, totally engrossed.

If you know a baseball fan, or someone who enjoys engaging, heartwarming stories, this is the perfect gift for you. It was at times equal parts funny, poignant and sweet. Seeing the story unfold through notes and letters was interesting and made for a light, quick reading experience. Highly recommend this.

I’m giving it a full 5 out of 5.

I’d say this is a wonderful gift for an uncle, grandfather, grandmother, aunt, mother, father, friend, niece, nephew…well, basically this is the perfect gift for anyone, no matter their age.

Buy it here or here. Read more about it here, on the authors website.

Review: If You Could See Me Now by Cecelia Ahern.

Posted November 24, 2007 by Rowena in Reviews | 3 Comments

Review: If You Could See Me Now by Cecelia Ahern.Reviewer: Rowena
If You Could See Me Now by Cecelia Ahern
Published by Hyperion
Publication Date: January 9th, 2007
Genres: Contemporary, Fantasy, Romance
Pages: 306
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Readers and critics alike adore Cecelia Ahern for her lighthearted yet insightful stories about modern women and their often unusual situations. In If You Could See Me Now, she takes that theme a step further, offering us a heroine who is entirely believable, and the new man in her life who is, well, slightly less so.

Elizabeth Egan's life runs on order: Both her home and her emotions are arranged just so, with little room for spontaneity. It's how she counteracts the chaos of her family -- an alcoholic mother who left when she was young, an emotionally distant father, and a free-spirited sister, who seems to be following in their mother's footsteps, leaving her own six-year old son, Luke, in Elizabeth's care. When Ivan, Luke's mysterious new grown-up friend, enters the picture, Elizabeth doesn't know quite what to make of him. With his penchant for adventure and colorful take on things large and small, Ivan opens Elizabeth's eyes to a whole new way of living. But is it for real? Is Ivan for real?

If You Could See Me Now is a love story with heart -- and just a touch of magic.

I bought this book a few months ago (okay a lot of months ago) and am just getting around to reading it because, well…something about this book put me off after I bought it, something I didn’t know when I bought it, something that even though it bothered me, it didn’t really take away from the story.

You see, I thought this book would be a romance between Elizabeth Egan and her imaginary friend, Ivan…but it wasn’t. Not, really anyway. You see, this book is about Elizabeth Egan and her journey to finding herself, her learning how to feel again and to …live again. She went through some stuff as a child with her Mother and she’s lived her adult life making sure that all sense of light, life and happiness was taken out of her life. She’s very strict about living in reality and not fantasy. She’s raised kids that don’t belong to her as a child and she’s found that she’s still raising kids that don’t belong to her now, all these many years later, as an adult.

Enter Luke’s imaginary friend, Ivan.

Luke is Elizabeth’s nephew and her adopted son, I guess you can say and he’s got an imaginary friend named Ivan. Nobody can see Ivan but Luke and at first it drives Elizabeth crazy because she has driven out all sorts of dreaminess and escapism out of her life and she will not stand by and let her nephew grow up to believe in fairy tales and dreams and be left with disappointment and cynicism.

To put it plainly, Elizabeth has a ginormous stick up her ass and she needs help digging that crap out.

That’s where Ivan comes in.

After a little while, Ivan who can’t be seen by anyone but Luke is now seen by his cynical aunt, Elizabeth and he forms a friendship with this very rigid woman and as time goes on, they begin to grow closer and closer and then as with all things adult, they start falling for each other.

Yeah, I know…you’re thinking, this is impossible, it can’t possibly amount to anything with Ivan, not being..real.

But the things Ivan brought to Elizabeth’s life made me sigh because if anyone needed to lighten up and enjoy life, the life that was passing her by, it was Elizabeth and it was good to see her walls disappear layer by layer with help from Ivan.

This book was straight up mushy fluff but I enjoyed it a lot. It reminded me a Tim Burton movie, one with lots of color and character, I really enjoyed it. My romantic heart got over the fact that nothing could ever come of Elizabeth’s relationship with Ivan and it soared when Elizabeth finally succeeded in sticking her ground and facing her fears and to see her stop running from life was really cool.

I hated the environment that Luke was growing up and at the end, though it wasn’t the kind of environment I was completely happy with, I was still happy at the lengths Elizabeth came to where Luke was concerned. I thought Luke was such a cutie little kid and I enjoyed him very much. I enjoyed seeing Elizabeth’s hardened heart soften toward the people in her life and I loved seeing her come around to loving the place she loathed so much and this book was just a wistful, dreamy story that made me smile when I finished it.

It’s not my favorite book of Cecelia Ahern but I did enjoy it. It’s not a romance novel, it’s more of a chick lit book and I’m glad that I finished it. This isn’t a book that you have to rush out and buy and devour because though I enjoyed the story as a whole, the book was a bit wordy for my tastes and it dragged in some parts but if you stick with it, you’ll like the story if you keep telling yourself, this isn’t a romance but a chick lit book….don’t forget that because if you’re looking for a romance in this book, you’ll be disappointed.

I loved the characters and I really enjoyed, Ivan. This book ended the way it needed to end and I can totally see this as a chick flick…it’s good stuff.

Review: Fair Play by Deirdre Martin.

Posted November 21, 2007 by Rowena in Reviews | 4 Comments

Review: Fair Play by Deirdre Martin.Reviewer: Rowena
Fair Play by Deirdre Martin
Series: New York Blades #2
Also in this series: Body Check
Published by Berkley
Publication Date: February 3rd 2004
Genres: Contemporary, Romance
Pages: 368
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three-stars

A little competition never hurt anybody...

Theresa Falconetti has it all: brains, beauty, a quick wit, and her own PR business. To the Deep disappointment of her large family, she never dates Italians, men from her old Brooklyn neighborhood, or professional athletes. Especially not athletes...

Michael Dante, popular hometown hero and winger for the Stanley Cup champion New York Blades is all three—and he is head over heels for her.

For Michael, Theresa's NO HOCKEY PLAYERS rule is a check to the heart. Nothing he does seems to melt her resolve. His stubborn refusal to give up on this wisecracking brunette, who—he knows—is hiding from her roots, is driving them both nuts. And whe he hires her to publicize his family's restaurant, more than the kitchen heats up. Then Theresa finds herself an Upper East Side kind of guy and Micheal is forced to take his game to the next level.

IT'S FACE OFF TIME...

The book following Body Check follows Janna McNeil’s best friend, Theresa Falconetti’s journey to true love with Michael Dante’. We met Michael Dante’ in Body Check when he was trying to get at Theresa but failed to impress her because he’s everything she doesn’t want in a man…mainly he’s Italian and from Brooklyn and a hockey player so she’s not trying to have anything to do with him. She’s very snooty and she’s very stubborn and I found that I just couldn’t like her. No matter what DM wrote about Theresa, it set my teeth on edge. I understand that things happened in the first book that made her into the person that she is in this book but she had two guys in her life…one that was absolutely perfect and everything she SHOULD have wanted in a man but didn’t and then another one who was just totally slimey and wrong for her and who does she want?

Contestant # SCUMBAG!

It got on my hot damn nerves and I wanted to frickin’ shake some hot dang sense into her. Goodness each and every time she pushed Mikey away, I wanted to take a bat and beat her with it. He was so good to her and she just kept kicking him in the teeth and when he finally lost it and yelled at her I got mad at him for apologizing about that because he had every right to yell at her the way he did because he didn’t deserve everything that she put him through, he went out of his way to make sure she was comfortable AT ALL TIMES and what did he get for his trouble? A swift kick to the knee caps and every time she got pissed off because her family invited him to dinner at THEIR house?

Yeah, I wanted to smack the crap out of her. It was just more and more of all things annoying where Theresa was concerned, she was so annoying that even Janna was annoyed with her.

The whole Reese thing made me want to hurt someone because for her to want THAT when she could have someone like Mike totally went right over my head…I didn’t get it, AT ALL and the more she fell in “love” with Reese, the more I wanted to choke her the heck out.

This book was easy to read but it was easy to piss me off too…the more I read about Theresa, the more I wanted to backhand that tramp and the more Mike tried to win her over, the more I wanted to run him over with a motorcycle to get him to open up his dang eyes because he deserved so much more than Theresa gave to him and for him to pine away for her when he could have had any number of girls bothered me because it kind of made him look like a wimp to me…but my dumb ass still liked Mike. I loved watching him and Anthony fight and threatened and throw things at each other, I loved watching him with Gemma and the moonstone, she gave him was totally cute, the candles she gave him made me smile too. He was such a superstitious cutie patootie that I wanted so much more for him and I totally think that his reasons for not going to Theresa (the lie thingy with Anthony) at the end to tell her the truth was totally lame but whatev, I got over it.

The book could have been better but it was okay, I guess…It’s a total C read, not the best but it’ll do.

three-stars