Review: Take Me For A Ride by Karen Kendall

Genres: Romantic Suspense

Holly‘s review of Take Me For A Ride (ARTemis Agency, Book 3) by Karen Kendall

A stolen necklace, a hidden family treasure and the Russian mob collide in a sizzling-hot romance from the “witty, irresistible” imagination of Karen Kendall . . .

Art restorer Natalie Rosen is a true romantic, inspired by the world’s great art and literature. But nothing stirs her emotions like the legendary St. George necklace, which once belonged to Catherine the Great. The priceless heirloom was seized by the Nazis from Nat’s family in Old Russia, never to be seen again. When against all odds, the necklace turns up in her office for repairs before auction, it vanishes, along with the impulsive Natalie.

Hard-living recovery agent Eric McDougal is no gentleman, but then he’s never advertised himself as one. McDougal thrives on chasing women — and stolen art. Now he gets a dream assignment to do both, and thinks it’ll be a cinch. But he doesn’t count on his high-octane attraction to Natalie, or that she’ll unwittingly lead them both into a dangerous underworld where falling in love — and staying alive — are part of the game.

Based on the cover and blurb, I expected a darker romantic suspense. That isn’t what I got. Despite this being lighter than I expected, it started out fairly well. Unfortunately it quickly went downhill.

Most of my issues stemmed from the fact that Natalie is completely too stupid to live. She had absolutely no common sense. Right from the beginning I was scratching my head at her antics. The way she refused to go to the police and blindly trusted a stranger she met in a bar was just the beginning of a whole book full of stupid moves on her part.

Natalie’s grandmother constantly talked about a necklace that was stolen from her family when she was a girl, which turns up at the auction house where she works quite unexpectedly. She isn’t sure if it’s the actual necklace and wants to show it to her grandmother to be sure. Unfortunately grandma is legally blind and can’t travel, which means Natalie has to bring the necklace to her. This makes no sense to me because the woman can’t see, but what do I know?

Once she does, grandma refuses to give it back. She hides the necklace, then locks Natalie out of the house, refusing to let her back in until she’s bought plane tickets for them both to Russia. Her mother told her if she brought the necklace to a certain cathedral in Moscow, it would prove their identity and allow them access to treasures the family has hidden there.

Unsure what to do, Natalie decides to drown her sorrows with whiskey in a pub. Which is where she meets Eric McDougal. She thinks he’s just some stranger in a bar, but the truth is, Natalie’s boss has hired him to find the necklace – and Eric thinks Natalie is his most likely suspect. He plies her with liquor and she shares the whole sordid tale with him..and this is about the point the plot goes downhill.

Natalie tries to take Eric home, but he does the honorable thing and doesn’t take advantage of her. I understood that part, because she was drunk. But the next morning she’s still feeling all hearts and roses toward him – even though she doesn’t even know his last name. Then she finds her boss beaten up and tells him her grandma has the necklace. Turns out the dude who brought the necklace in for repairs is with the Russia Mafyia, and his boss isn’t happy that her boss lost the necklace. Natalie rushes to grandma’s house only to find she’s not home. She’s in complete panic mode when Eric calls her and she agrees to wait for him there so he can come save the day. The stranger she just met the night before. Riiight.

From there things just go from silly to downright strange. The characters start acting oddly, the plot takes strange leaps and twists that really have nothing to do with anything – at one point a Siberian Tiger appears..and gets fed Mongolian BBQ – and Natalie goes from stupid to just plain too stupid to live. She continues to put all of her trust in Eric. She relies on him to keep her safe, allows him to buy her a plane ticket and accompany her to Russia to chase after her grandmother, and pushes all concerns she has about his character aside. Then, at the end, gets pissed when she realizes what his true nature is. Uh, hello dumbass, you knew he wasn’t on the up-and-up. Why get pissed now? Plus, I can’t count the number of times she did something stupid that put her in danger.

After she almost gets kidnapped right off the street in Moscow she refuses to go to the hotel. She tells Eric she isn’t going to sit around and miss seeing the sites or looking for her grandma. It isn’t on her agenda. Eric begs her not to leave the hotel room just because she’s angry with him and she storms out anyway, knowing the Russians are right outside. If I was Eric I would have iced her just to save myself the misery of her company. Seriously.

I liked Eric a bit better, but it annoyed me how he claimed to be such a lady chaser and yet we saw no evidence of it. He was portrayed as a strong, chivalrous man right from the beginning. If the author hadn’t continually beat me over the head with his thoughts of how out of character it was for him to be so sweet I would never have known he was supposed to be an asshole.

The plot was just this side of ridiculous. There were so many plot holes and inconsistencies it resembled Swiss cheese. And just when I didn’t think it could get worse, something would come completely out of left field and prove me wrong…like the Siberian Tiger who was fed Mongolian BBQ.

Even the secondary characters, with the exception of some random Russian strangers – the ones responsible for the Mongolian BBQ, as a matter of fact – were annoying. There was a secondary storyline running parallel to this one that featured the couple from the first book. Based on their actions in this book, I have no desire whatsoever to read that one. They’re engaged, but she doesn’t trust him in the least. Honestly, I don’t think she even likes him much. She was supposed to come off as being tough and street savvy, I think, but instead she just seemed like a bitch. And not the good kind of bitch either. The kind who acts all hard-nosed but is really just a big ball of annoying.

I wish I could find something to recommend this, but of the romance, characters and plot there isn’t one thing I can think of that worked. There might be an audience for this book, but I’m not it. I thought it sucked big donkey balls.

1 out of 5

The series:

This book is available from Signet Eclipse. You can buy it here or here in e-format.

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